Dark Walter ficlet
Jan. 26th, 2005 07:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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bloody_shorts
Here is a very dark and depressing narrative written from Dark Walter's perspective. Spoilers for manga. Rated PG13.
I feel like I've been reduced to a toy soldier, my every movement controlled by someone else. That crazy fat man going on about loving war is operating my controls and tells me what to do. I obey him without a second thought. The murders I commit pain me – I may be under his power, but I know what I’m doing and it is wrong to kill other men. The most awful part is who I work for. I have always hated them and now they control me. They are among the worst to exist in mankind’s history – the Nazis. I have hated them since I was a young boy. They killed my mum and pop in front of my very eyes because of who they were. Millions of others they slaughtered, all in the name of purifying Germany. Deep inside of my soul I try to resist but I cannot. I wonder if it is some cruel joke – how can I, Walter Dollneaz, be a puppet of the Nazi’s? How on earth did they manage to survive? I don’t want to be on this side and yet…I am. I look up ahead and see my former allies, my comrades. Integral, the woman I have watched grow up and protected is watching her city burn down. I am told I will assist in her capture. Will I be able to fulfill that command? If they order me to kill her, can I? My soul is screaming to me to leave this wretched place. Secretly I hope that the young Hellsing vampire, Seras Victoria, or Integral will put an end to my sins before I go completely insane. I feel my mind slipping away with each human life I take. Yet, inside I cling to that shadow of the man I used to be. For when that shadow disappears from my soul completely - Walter Dollneaz will no longer exist. I can only pray that someone kills me before my soul is consumed by the monster I have become. The thirst for blood consumes me. So far I have not killed to feed the hunger but I cannot resist it much longer. The Nazi’s have kept me hungry wanting me to feed on the masses of London. I wonder who will be the unlucky one when I finally succumb to their wishes. Will it be the grocer I bought tea from? Or will I drink the blood of a baker? Shall I slaughter the mailman? Perhaps it will be one of the Hellsing soldiers I used to joke with. As much as it pains me, I think of slaughtering one of the unknown innocents I see fleeing from this nightmare. I fear that by the time I come face to face with Integral Hellsing, my madness and blood thirst will have consumed me and my first taste of human blood will be hers. I can only hope that my shadow will never let that happen.
bloody_shortsHere is a very dark and depressing narrative written from Dark Walter's perspective. Spoilers for manga. Rated PG13.
I feel like I've been reduced to a toy soldier, my every movement controlled by someone else. That crazy fat man going on about loving war is operating my controls and tells me what to do. I obey him without a second thought. The murders I commit pain me – I may be under his power, but I know what I’m doing and it is wrong to kill other men. The most awful part is who I work for. I have always hated them and now they control me. They are among the worst to exist in mankind’s history – the Nazis. I have hated them since I was a young boy. They killed my mum and pop in front of my very eyes because of who they were. Millions of others they slaughtered, all in the name of purifying Germany. Deep inside of my soul I try to resist but I cannot. I wonder if it is some cruel joke – how can I, Walter Dollneaz, be a puppet of the Nazi’s? How on earth did they manage to survive? I don’t want to be on this side and yet…I am. I look up ahead and see my former allies, my comrades. Integral, the woman I have watched grow up and protected is watching her city burn down. I am told I will assist in her capture. Will I be able to fulfill that command? If they order me to kill her, can I? My soul is screaming to me to leave this wretched place. Secretly I hope that the young Hellsing vampire, Seras Victoria, or Integral will put an end to my sins before I go completely insane. I feel my mind slipping away with each human life I take. Yet, inside I cling to that shadow of the man I used to be. For when that shadow disappears from my soul completely - Walter Dollneaz will no longer exist. I can only pray that someone kills me before my soul is consumed by the monster I have become. The thirst for blood consumes me. So far I have not killed to feed the hunger but I cannot resist it much longer. The Nazi’s have kept me hungry wanting me to feed on the masses of London. I wonder who will be the unlucky one when I finally succumb to their wishes. Will it be the grocer I bought tea from? Or will I drink the blood of a baker? Shall I slaughter the mailman? Perhaps it will be one of the Hellsing soldiers I used to joke with. As much as it pains me, I think of slaughtering one of the unknown innocents I see fleeing from this nightmare. I fear that by the time I come face to face with Integral Hellsing, my madness and blood thirst will have consumed me and my first taste of human blood will be hers. I can only hope that my shadow will never let that happen.
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Yeah...
Date: 2005-01-26 05:26 pm (UTC)I think Hirano's obsessed with the idea of how far someone will go to lose their soul (Integra working with Alucard, she loses it a piece at a time, each time she sends Alucard out to kill) and Walter who just lost his soul all at once.
As long as you credit me for the overall idea (or what you want to borrow from my thoughts), I don't mind. I even have some time to read if you want to send me anything. Perhaps, if you want, I can give some feedback (or be your sounding board:). Since our ideas are similar at times, I would even try co-writing or such. I do have a week off in Feb. (14-18). Also, I have my private email available to my friends of LJ. Whatever you want to do, let me know.:)